Champions League Final Recap

I don't care if you like soccer at all, if this Champions League final between Man U and Chelsea didn't get you fired up, you're probably someone I have no interest in talking to. Like a NASCAR fan. Or Skip Bayless. Congratulations to Manchester United...the lesser of two evils prevailed.

Recap:
The first 20 minutes of the match were completely unspectacular, not surprising given the tentativeness and nervousness of each side. In the 20th, Makalele van Dammed Scholes nose with his forehead and bloodied him up. This seemed to spark United, as 6 minutes later, Wes Brown swung a beautiful cross into the box, which was headed in by Ronaldo with laserlike precision.

United dominated the rest of the first half until a comedy of errors gifted Chelsea an equalizer just before the break. Essien drilled a shot which ricocheted off about 6 United players, Sir Alex Ferguson, Roman Abramovich's wallet, Eric Cantona, and Avram Grant's insane wife before being bundled home by "Anne" Frank Lampard.

The second half started exactly as the first, with almost no chances for either side. Chelsea, clearly boosted by their late first half goal, had the better run of play, and started to create some chances after the 70th minute.

Extra time provided a lot of fireworks, especially in the second half, as building tensions finally boiled over. A skirmish between the sides ended up with a series of yellow cards and a shocking straight red card for Drogba. In a moment of absolute stupidity, Drogba slapped Vidic in the face, right in front of the ref. If the rumors are to be believed, Drogba is likely headed out of the Premiership via the transfer market this summer, so this may have been his last act in Chelsea Blue. Shades of Zidane in the world cup, anyone? Not having the Ivorian striker for penalties may have cost Chelsea and Abramovich their elusive first European championship title.

The match proceeded to spot kicks, where Tevez, Ballack, Carrick, and Beletti all scored. Ronaldo stepped up to take his penalty, did his (probably illegal) patented stutter step move, and pushed the ball right into Petr Cech's welcoming arms. Lampard, Hargreaves, Cole, and Nani all buried their strikes, so the Champions League title rested on the boot of Chelsea captain John Terry. And he should have won it. Edwin van der Sar dove to his right, and Terry aimed top left. Unfortunately for the Londoners, Terry slipped on the wet, newly installed field right as he was about to strike and the ball slammed off the right upright, giving United a second life. Anderson, Kalou, and Giggs took care of business, so it was down to winter transfer Nicolas Anelka to keep Chelsea alive. The French international fired left, van der Sar guessed correctly, punched the ball away, and secured another international success for Sir Alex and the double for this Man U squad.

Players of the Match:
Christiano Ronaldo
John Terry (Regular/Extra Time)
Frank Lampard
Wes Brown
Nemanja Vidic
Petr Cech

Goats of the Match:
Carlos Tevez
John Terry (penalties)
Rio Ferdinand
Didier Drogba
Nicolas Anelka
Luzhniki Stadium turf

Hopefully this will spark some American interest (finally?) in European soccer. If the rumors about ESPN3 and buying Premiership rights are true, I will be one absurdly happy Anglophile. Next year in Rome...go Gunners!




Are you watching, Arsene? This is what $20+ million signings get you.

-The Schwab